This is the pilot episode of Hands With Hans, a tutorial series to top them all! Hans is a transfer student from Lithubobsivania, a small country just north of Albuquerque. All he’s ever wanted to do in his life was become a model, but after a tragic disfiguring asphalt accident Hans was left to fade into the background of Lithubobsivania’s slums. That is, until one day he stumbled upon a magical camera that allows him to create tutorial videos where you never see his horrible horrible face. I kid you not, this guy is so ugly that I puked the first and second time I saw him, and the regurgitated contents of my stomach was more appealing to look at than he was. I try not to think about it. Anyways, after moving to sunny Eugene, Oregon, Hans discovered that Eugene was not, in fact sunny, and he even began too question whether or not it was in Oregon. He has been making videos ever since, and promptly throwing each copy into the fireplace to keep warm in the long winter. This one managed to survive.
Clearly as I was making this video my intention was to be a little bit ridiculous. I did, however, insert some truths into the lies. That’s right, I am really from Lithubobsivania, but not really. I am a really forgetful person though, and I did forget about this assignment until yesterday. I figured I might as well be as real as possible and take on the persona of Hans the Horribly Disfigured Lithubobsivanian.